i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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