you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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