Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I just had sex on a roof
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
