Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
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