i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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