so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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