and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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