yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize
