talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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