Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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