I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
