the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
