i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
the liver wants what the liver wants
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize