Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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