so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
