A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
