When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize
