You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize