And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
