Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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