Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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