fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
