So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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