Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
