Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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