Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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