he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
