Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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