I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
