He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
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