I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
