i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Panties = found
Randomize
