I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize