I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize
