he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
