Already got asked if we're dating
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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