I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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