I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
This toilet bowl is my home.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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