Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
