I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
