What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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