This girl is more easily done than said...
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
