Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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