Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize