Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
