he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
