420 ftw
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
