And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Boobs are out for the taking
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
