We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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