no. you can't hotbox the world.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
