she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
