hell yes lets make some ravioli
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I'm always down for nudity.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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