Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
love makes seman taste better
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
